5 “Don’t s”for a better relationship with a fibromyalgia or CSF doctor
Why the relation is difficult??
When you have fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome, a good relationship with your doctor can be a huge benefit for you. It can help you find better treatments, learn more, and be more satisfied. At the same time, it can especially difficult for those of us with these conditions to forge those relationships. On the doctor’s end, several things that play into may include:
>>some doctors not believing in this illness
>>some doctors are not informed about them
>>lack of faith in their ability to treat us
>>pre-conceived notions of us as patient
We patients can be part of problem as well, we may
>>>have little faith in their ability to treat us
>>go in with pre-conceived notions about them
>>look for wrong qualities in doctor
>>have unrealistic expectations about appointments
You may able to build or repair your relation with your doctor by following these 5 Don’ts. As all the people are not good, same is the case that all the people are not bad. Some doctors are not good choice for fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome patients. If your doctor doesn’t take your disease seriously, find someone else to treat you.
1. Don’t Lie
A lot of people lie to their doctors whether they have followed recommendations or what non-traditional treatments they may be trying. That is not only hindrance to getting the best medical care, it can be downright dangerous.
So admit that you didn’t exercise more and explain why. Admit it when you are not great about taking your medicines. All of that is information a doctor can use to better tailor a treatment regimen to you.
For instance, a doctor may be able to prescribe a controlled-release version you only take once a day if your doctors knows you often forget to take a second daily dosage of a medication.
In some cases a lie can lead to a dangerous situation.
But there is a thing a doctor can’t agree what you are doing is right but he can’t refrain you from doing it. Even so they need to know what you are doing can steer you away from the things that are dangerous for you.
2. Don’t whine
Whining is really attractive quality. It’s obnoxious enough in a toddler, but likely even more annoying in adult. Whining happens sometimes when you are in pain or exhausted, but it can take make your doctor to feel less serious towards you. You cannot blame them, their aim is to hear your concerns, address them as well as possible, and move on to the next patient.
There also come times, when you are so worried about your health that while talking to your doctor you start crying, you are afraid of your diagnosis or lack of diagnosis. A good doctor should understand that you are in difficult situation. This is not the kind of thing I am talking about here.
If you are passing through a moment where you need to whine, find some friends to talk use twitter or face book page to share your feelings, where people can understand what you are going through. Don’t see a doctor when you are going through your worst moments.
Research shows that some doctors are dread treating us because we are an especially whinny bunch. Deal with fact rather than emotion, and surprise the next one with being straight forward.
3. Don’t look for sympathy
I hear it all the time that my doctor is not compassionate,my response?? that is not what your doctor is for.
Sure it would be wonderful to have someone empathzie with how hard it is to live with these illnesses , to have a shoulder to cry on and a sympathetic ear, to leave feeling like you have unloaded all of your troubles.
The thing is the word for someone who provide those things is not physician. It could be a therapist, friend or family member, someone from your support group, or your minister but its not your primary care provider or rheumatologist.
4. Don’t be offensive
Many of us had doctors who dismissed us and our symptoms and our diagnosis and us as human beings. May be the doctors accuse that you are lying, malingering, or drug seeking. Those are horrible experiences and should not have subjected to them. If you have interacted with several doctors like them you may feel like the whole medical community is against you.
You won’t win any points with the next doctor you see if you let yourself be openly defensive and resentful. Try to give a chance to human being to treat you nicely, to prove that they are better than any schmuck who sent you away with tears. Try as hard you can to go in with a clean state.
Do what you can to set a more positive tone going forward, if you have clashed with a doctor you have seeing before. It just might improve your relationship, if not you can find someone better hopefully soon.
5. Don’t make assumptions
After visiting every doctor you have to hear the old advice about exercising more and more??Or maybe the long time favorite, you are just depressed??
Yes it is very frustrating to hear those things after visiting every doctor, but just because the last 5 have said, that doesn’t mean the next will say the same. Again wipe that state clean and don’t assume you know everything that will come out of a doctor’s mouth.
While that is how I try to approach new situation, I go in armed with rebuttals, just in case, but I don’t wear them on my sleeves. It goes back to having a good attitude and not pre-judging the doctor. After all you don’t want the doctor to pre-judge you.
5 “Do’s”for a better relationship with a fibromyalgia or CSF doctor
Why is it so hard??
When you have fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome its important to work hard with your hard to work for treatment regimen that work best for you. Unfortunately a lot us work badly to build a good realtionship with a doctor. what is the reason behind this, may b your doctor don’t believe your condition and may be he don’t know how to treat you.
While you can take responsibility for only 5% per of that relationship, if you can be a better patient it can enable your doctor to be a better doctor as well.
That doesn’t mean you should always do what your doctor wants you to do. Rather it is a way of approaching your appointments and the relationship itself.
1. Do be prepared
Doctors appointments are often short, for 15 minutes or even less than that. This often is not your doctor’s fault but is dictated by administrator and is an attempt to meet high demand. It is important to make the most of the time you have. Before going to appointment think about few things, have any symptoms significantly getting better or worse??Have you changed anything about your treatment plan?Have diet or lifestyle impacted your health??Are your medications causing any new side effects??Is there any treatment you would like to try?These are all those things your doctor need to know.
Being prepared will show your doctor that you are holding up your end of relationship and hopefully will help the appointments meed your needs.
2.Do be direct
It is normal to be intimidated by the white coat and degrees posted on the wall. Don’t let that make you too timid to say what you need. Beating around bush about your symptoms is likely to waste your precious time and possibly try your doctor’s patience.
Try to talk to your doctor in a direct professional manner, if if you want to talk about an embarrassing symptom, using clinical terms can help,for example use stools instead of poop. This is important when asking about something your doctor object to such as complementary or alternative treatment. Treatment decisions are yours to make in the end, remember that.
3.Do educate yourself
In the medical community the term Googler is often used in a derogatory way to describe patients who do a research of their symptoms and think they are suddenly an expert. You don’t want to be one of those patients, but you do want to be educated.
First you want to rely on reputable websites for your medical information. Before reading what a site has to say look at who is saying it and ask what they have to gain. Is it a site that sells supplements?? Is it a chiropractic site looking for patients??or is it a site that exists to give you helpful information.
some reputable websites include:
>About.com Health , where all health contents go through a medical review board.
>>Medline plus,from the U.S National Library of Medicine
>>University of Maryland Medical Center
>>WebMd
4.Do be realistic
Doctors are human, the body is complicated so fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue syndrome is difficult to treat. A mountain of medical research is published every month. Keeping these realities in mind can help you manage your expectations of your doctor.
Expect false starts when it comes to treatment. Each of us respond differently to drugs and treatments and doctor can’t know what will work best for you. Finding successful treatments take time and experimentation.
Don’t expect that your doctor know each and every thing about your condition unless you meet a micro-specialist.
Eliminating false expectations can help you deal better with the limitations your doctor faces and free you up to focus what can be accomplished during your appointments.
5. Do have good self-efficacy
Self-efficacy is how good you are doing the things that help you feel better. Its not the same as compliance, which is doing what your doctor told you to do. I don’t like the word compliance it suggests that I am a passive participant in the treatment process simply doing what I am being told.
I would much rather have good self efficacy by taking the medicines that work how they are prescribed as well as managing my diet, activity level, stress and lifestyle in ways that I have determined are beneficial. That puts me at the center of my health care which is where i need to be.
However even i have to admit that compliance is part of self efficacy. If you don’t try things that your doctor suggests , you can’t make informed decisions about whether to adopt or discard them.
For support and Discussion join the group “Living with Fibromyalgia and Chronic Illness”
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